I am… - A different perspective, so he thinks!

Feed The Needy!

OK, so…for those that don’t know I am moving into my new flat this weekend (Woohoo). This amazing event has a downside though, POVERTY! in order to get around this mammoth problem I have invented The Nick Duddy Food Drive. Basically The Nick Duddy Food Drive is where you send me food so I don’t starve and die. It can be anything as long as it’s good, if you’re sending a canned good can you send a can opener because I don’t have one yet and it would be cruel in a Saw sort of way to give me food I couldn’t eat.

I must warn you, if you send me a can of Heniz Ravioli I will find out where you live and throw it through your window like a monatauk cocktail.

To send me food please email me for my address.

Thanks, I love you all! (What I mean is I love the ones that send me food)

I enter the Warpmart competition all the time and I have never won..

I think that Warpmart is plotting against me. A few years back I bought a record bag from Warpmart, it was a fine piece of ass, but like all fine pieces off ass in my life it was faulty and had to be returned. A long story short I waited 3 months to get the money back from Warpmart. Now I am a reasonable man but 3 MONTHS! to refund £80 and then instead of being nice to me they had an attitude with me, obviously the concept of customer satisfaction has not yet reach the smelly non-washers at Warpmart; anyway that air through the engine. So obviously as the customer service sucked I have been purchasing all my Warp necessities from other more customer centric stores or direct if I can, the last Warp piece I bought was the Flying Lotus Album.

The Conspiracy…

I think since I kicked up a stink they have completely ignored my competition entries; they can easily identify me in their database, I mean my email address looks like an Al Qaeda name you see it from a mile away! I know I have been getting the answers right and I must be one of the first in the door because I spend most of my time on a computer and get the emails as the come into my inbox. See to let me win the competition at least once might give me faith to shop there again, regain a customer!

Well that just feels like a weight has been lifted, I love my blog it absorbs my mental rantings and doesn’t look at me strangely!

Your lives my be at risk

WARNING THIS POST CONTAINS LANGUAGE OF AN ADULT NATURE!
OK, I do believe in the whole reduce your carbon foot print thing and due to excessive price of oil I have been driving at 50 mph in order to save on fuel. It actually works I can get up to 60 miles extra if I do this, so it save me quite a bit.

However, in saying this I feel that I have increased my chances of dying in a road accident (this says alot considering I also drive a motorcycle). Why is this you ask? Because every arsehole and their mother drives at 50 mph. Let me take a moment and define arsehole; an arsehole, in the driving sense, is someone that can’t make decisions or are hesitant to when driving on the road. This particular type of ‘arsehole’ is the one that indicates for about 25 seconds before moving into the lane by which time the ‘arsehole’ has missed their opportunity to move into the lane.

What this arsehole does not realize is the impact they have on all of the other traffic. For instance because they are hesitating the bus that is in the lane which they want to get into has become frustrated and try to get in behind the arsehole, this frustration has caused the bus driver to neglect his mirrors and almost plow into the car coming up behind the arsehole. (True story)

To summerise, although driving at 50 mph is good for your pocket and the environment it puts your life in danger.